“For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever wants loses his life because of Me and the gospel will save it. For what does it benefit a man to gain the whole world yet lose his life?” Mark 8:35-36.
I recently stumbled upon an iceberg’s picture to describe this concept. Underneath the iceberg were the unseen areas that lead to success: perseverance, discipline, hard work, sacrifice, disappointment, discipline, dedication etc. The ‘seen’ part of the iceberg is SUCCESS! I must admit I found this illustration very appealing and thought it perfectly described how I go about various tasks in my life. I browbeat myself until I have persevered and accomplished the goals that I have set for myself. And then when victory comes, I feel a sense of accomplishment for having worked on this with all my effort.
This week, God convicted me of my desire to succeed in everything I set my heart and mind to. My devotional reading for one of the days of this week had this statement: “Are you willing to be a failure?” Ouch! Failure? No way!! Failures are not looked at with the same sense of awe and admiration as successes are. Failures are humiliating. A crushing defeat is not one to celebrate. It is disappointing. It is discouraging.
I had to make a decision this week about something I had started myself on. I was so certain it was the way to go. I fought through sleepless nights, pushed forward when my tiring body signaled many times to give up on this undertaking. I was adamant that I would not be one who throws in the towel. My health began failing. My relationships began to get strained. One of my good friends told me this week, “You remind me of the Chinese who juggle different utensils on the air. You are trying to keep them all spinning at the same time. This is not going to work. Everything is going to crash and you are afraid of that crash, so you keep them all on the air. But how long are you going to do this juggling act?” Another good friend went, “You know clearly what decision you need to take but you are afraid to fail.”
Under this duress I had imposed upon myself, I was breaking. Yet I was stubborn and unyielding to the voice of the Holy Spirit to ‘let go’ and trust God and well-meaning advice around me to give up on this one responsibility. I pushed through the alarm bells. And then, just as I thought I was still on the right path, God whispered to me ever so gently again “Are you willing to be a failure? Are you willing to let go of this dream that you have been carrying on for years and trust Me with your life’s journey? “
Am reminded today of the story of Moses. He was a Hebrew boy whose parents desperately attempted to save him when the Egyptian king was killing all Hebrew baby boys. His parents placed him in a basket and floated the basket among reeds. An Egyptian princess bathing in the river saw his basket, heard the crying baby inside, took pity on him, loved him instantly and adopted him as her own son. Moses’ own mother served as his nurse. Moses knew from childhood that God created him to save the Israelites from the power of the Egyptians. He grew up as an Egyptian prince. One day when an Israelite was being beaten by an Egyptian, Moses kills the Egyptian. He then runs for his life into the wilderness for fear of being prosecuted for murder. He spends 40 years in this wilderness. Moses knew what his purpose was. Imagine his disappointment when everything that seemed to go well suddenly looked futile. How was he supposed to lead the Israelites by being in the wilderness? It did not make any sense. He probably went through many years living in guilt: if only I had not killed that Egyptian man, I would still be in the palace and maybe even be king now. He may have had many episodes of brooding over this incident. If only I had not failed…Little did Moses know that God would visit with him after 40 years- time that he certainly would have taken to move on and just live as a shepherd in the wild instead of a prince in the palace. God did use Moses to lead His people out of Egypt and deliver them. But God used Moses in His timing and in His way.
Take the story of Joseph. He had a dream when he was a teenager that the sun and the stars bowed down to him and also that the sheaves of his father and siblings bowed down to his sheave. Yet God used several disappointments and failures in his life to bring him to a place where he could be used: after being sold as a slave to Egyptian traders, being unfairly and falsely accused of a crime he did not commit by Potiphar’s wife, spending years in the prison, being forgotten by Pharaoh’s servants when he interpreted their dreams correctly, Joseph was finally in a position to receive from God. Overnight God brought about a new situation that only Joseph could solve. Overnight he went from prison to become the second most powerful man on Egypt and in the world: when he served as prime minister in Egypt.
Today, as you contemplate on these stories, I encourage you to reflect on your life. What is God asking you to let go of today? What have you taken hold of, thinking this is what He wants you to do and are carrying on with your own strength when you know deep inside that this is not the right thing to do now? Perhaps the fear of failure is holding you back. Perhaps the fear of “what others would think” is making you hold on to this even more fiercely. I urge you: listen to what God has to say about this. If He wants you to let go, trust God on this. Let go and let God.
It does not matter whether you fail or succeed in life. What matters is that you are true to God. That you are walking in obedience to what He has for you. Your “success” will come. But it won’t come the way you want it to. It will happen in His way and in His timing.
I encourage you to reflect on the following scriptures given in God’s Word about the plans He has for you.
Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
1 Corinthians 2:9 says, “But as it is written: What eye did not see and ear did not hear, and what never entered the human mind– God prepared this for those who love Him.”
In Isaiah 55:8-9 it is written, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”
Prayer
Heavenly Father, I see that you are urging me today to let go of the things that I am holding on to tightly. I want to trust You on this journey of life. I want to trust Your Word that Your plans for me are good and are there to give me hope and a future. Your plans for me are far higher than what I can ever imagine for myself. Far greater than anyone can imagine for me! By Your grace and strength, I am willing to let go of this malady to strive for success and fear failure. In Jesus’ Name, amen.